Married

I wrote this the day I got married this past August in anticipation that I would have a "real" wedding this coming May. I wanted to commemorate our legal ceremony and how I felt when it happened. We have now decided to move the wedding date back almost a year, and I didn't want to keep the secret any longer. Fiance is actually Husband! 

Engagement photos with Mom

Engagement photo with Dad

I'm getting married today.

Fiance and I are keeping it a secret right now because we can't yet afford a real ceremony or reception, so we're just meeting with our family at the courthouse, and we don't want people to view our wedding later as optional.

But really, we just can't wait.

I'm kind of reminded of Leslie's wedding from Parks and Rec. How she threw it together and the last minute and it just all felt right because she and Ben couldn't wait to start their lives together.

That's how this is. We could wait. The same way that we could live without each other. But we choose not to. We choose each other.

Fiance is my best friend and the best human being I've had the privilege to know. He is incredibly generous and kind with everyone he knows, he is so intelligent it's scary, and he is so loving toward me it takes my breath away.

And frankly, he ain't bad to look at, either!

Saying our vows

"You may kiss the bride!"

Many of you will know of my one other experience with relationships from my Abuse series. If you haven't read it, it's all collected under one tab at the top of the page. Also, the fact that it's called the "Abuse series" probably gives something away about the quality of the relationship. I felt pretty bad about myself before all that and worse about myself after. It took me years to understand that what happened in that relationship wasn't right, and exactly how wrong it was.

Fiance fixed all that. He made me feel whole and human and loved again. I've heard this sentiment before and it very much applies here: He renews my faith in God as he is a perfect representation of God's love for me.

We dream all the time about our future home and the children we might have, where we'll live, what we'll do, even which appliances we'd prefer! I just can't wait to get started!

So I'm not going to wait anymore. I've found my best friend and I'm ready for him to be my husband.

We used my engagement ring as the wedding band.

Everyone wanted a picture of us eating the cake. It took so long and
we were just sitting there with bites in our mouths! I started to laugh.